Where is Mike Pence today to tell everybody it’s all under control? Come out, come out, wherever you are, people.

Not to go all InfoWars here, but I’m going to offer a conspiracy theory: Everywhere Pence visits, COVID cases spike. Is he our super-spreader?

Where is Donald Trump today? What workplace has he contaminated with his unchecked thermal breath?

He’s done nasal swabs. Maybe he will breathe on a week’s worth of short ribs.

Trump clearly thought he met his monthly quota simply by contaminating Tulsa. Yes, but it’s July.

Remember Tulsa? Sorry, we can’t get Tulsa out of our heads – the stupidity of cramming people together sans masks, campaign attendants frantically removing stickers on seats that advised six-feet separation.

Turns out the MAGA regulars had all the elbow room anyone would desire.

I heard Trump’s surgeon general speak this morning on TV. Talk about a non-essential job. He knows whatever he says, his boss will do the opposite.

Trump says he needs no face covering because he’s clean of the virus. The quintessential editorial cartoon depicting Pence reveals that he needs no face mask because he has no face.

They are the face of the Republican Party, welcome mat for the novel coronavirus.

Infected or no, if Trump were an actual leader who had a shred of compassion for people suffering and dying, he’d be the first to don a mask, like Joe Biden has done. I don’t know what the focus groups are finding in honing Biden’s campaign slogans, but I would like to nominate something he’s said about the chief obligation of a president, and that is a “duty to care.” Print that sucker and stick it in some front lawns. Which brings us back to all those things health professionals say we should do if we really want the economy back.

As for those bleeping face coverings, two imperatives commend them: (1) actual protection – you know, “duty to care” (2) and modeling — you know, showing you give a fig about doing the right thing.

The most ridiculous claim made by those eschewing social distancing and other measures is that such things restrict their freedom. Dr. Payal Kohli, a cardiologist who appears on Denver television to discuss health issues, has an apt response. She calls the mask “a symbol of freedom,” a means toward mobility and some normalcy in a very abnormal time.

How we get the economy going again is listening to health professionals — not Trump, not Larry Kudlow.

Commentator John Pavlovitz, who has had a laser focus on Trump idiot-ology from the start, writes of the “cultic adoration” that has caused people to refuse to wear masks because “to do so would mean (Trump) was wrong all along and that they were lied to and that we are in grave danger.”

Which we are. The numbers don’t lie. The Pandemic Duo lies.

Watch as the cult now tries to say that this disease isn’t so much of a problem because not as many people are dying of COVID-19, percentage-wise, compared to infection rates.

Well, hear from those who’ve had the disease and didn’t die. Anyone who continues to equate this to the flu deserves a “been-there, done that” dose. You first, Rush Limbaugh.

In the midst of this, said Joe Biden, “We don’t need a cheerleader, Mr. President. We need a president.”

Biden also might have said we need a president and vice president with certifiable nerve endings.

“I’ll show him,” thought Trump. “I’ll go to Mount Rushmore for fireworks.”

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